Tania Kettle

'Tis the season for abuse.

I mean, if you really want to be pedantic, it's all the time, but now is when people talk about it more.

So today I want to talk with you about how to deal with it.

Not you, the one being abused, but you, the one whose heart breaks everytime you hear about it.

Before we start, I need you to understand that they'll leave when they're ready, and not one thing you say, or do, is going to change that or make it happen earlier.

So now onto you:

It's heartbreaking when you hear them talk about the words that are thrown at them, the ugliness and filth, humiliation and degradation. 

No woman, or any person, should be spoken to like that.

And the ice that runs through your veins when they speak of machetes, knives and guns that their person plays with while they spew this abuse, you have to be some sort of brave to hear that.

Sometimes they have taped their abuser and want you to hear.

The quick answer is, No.

Trust me on this one, you do not wish to hear this.

The first time will break your heart, the 100th time will make you want to get on your knees and beg them to walk away.

They won't.  

Until they're ready.

So today I'm all about keeping you safe.

You need to have your emotional safety plan, the one that allows you to sleep at night and it goes like this:

I love you, but you cannot ask me to listen to what he does to you, then walk out my door and go back to him.

Kissy hugs

T and Spirit

xx