Horse Sense....

 

                 

 

Ok, so we have a tentative date to snip the young one next week.

Working on weather and any other out of our hands issues.

We've had to rush this now, because the not-so-little one is trying to constantly shag Mumma, who is doing her very best not to accomodate.  Unfortunately, those that know better have said the little one will get his way sooner or later.

Hence, the urgency for his snip.

Although, and this is just between you, me and the bed post, he would make an awesome stallion.

He is everything that I love as a baby Daddy - height, build, bum, stamina, want-to-run desire, speed and intelligence.

Anyway, nevermind...

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Bloody Patrick now walks with me every morning, chatting away, while we go let his chicky babes out.

He's a quite charming, and charismatic, old rogue.

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There's been some huge conversations about medicine recently and I just can't believe how many people don't understand that where modern medicine (from the Doctor) originally came from, is plants and herbs.

How the fuck can you not know that?

And it hurts my soul that we teach our girls to aim to be a size 2, yet don't teach them how to eat to their cycle, how to have a Soul weight and how to live in balance.

I don't understand how we fell off the path so much.

I also don't get how anxiety and depression became so "normal", when in reality they are anything but.  They are your body's warning signs that you are in crisis.

And crisis is not normal.

When I talk about herbs with the horses though, I speak that the horses have shown me that a herb will work differently for a Mumma, mare, filly, colt, gelding and stallion.  And also depending on season, time of day, weather (hot, cold, rain, snow) and where you are in your cycle.  

That's powerful stuff.

But to be honest, I don't know how to talk about that with humans, I'm still stuck on the whole Soy thing.

Well, explain to me if Soy is fine, then how come since Soy has gone into all our food our men are getting breasts and breast cancer? 

Technically, that's a physical impossiblity.

or

Since Soy has entered our food, our percentage of gender fluidity, gender neutral, transgender, pangender etc has exponentially increased.  We also know Soy is a hormone disruptor, because this has been Scientifically proven, so do you think there might be a correlation between the two?

There is no judgement on the above statement.  I literally do not give a fuck who you sleep with or what gender you are on any given day.

Literally.  No.  Fuck.

But seriously, I can't be assed talking about Soy with humans, because I'm banging my head against a brick wall, and I just don't know whether it is ignorance, arrogance or stupidity.  

That humans don't know better or just can't be better.

Anyway, I now sit smack bang on the, As long as you stay the fuck away from my pregnant Mumma and babies, you do you side now.

Wait...almost forgot, do you know that the only peeps that Soy is known to be good for?

Menopausal women in their 50's because...wait for it...it increases Estrogen levels.

Y'all are tapped with the stupid stick.

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And remember when I was whinging that my chickies weren't laying...I'm now getting a minimum of 5 dozen a week.  

That's 60+ eggs.

Minimum.

Apparently, when the days are longer, hens can often lay 2 eggs a day. 

Again, this would have been helpful if I had known.

To be fair though, it wouldn't have made a difference.  I love having chickens, I love having 10 chickens (plus that damn Rooster) and I just give the eggs away. 

Spirit are funny like that, they were like, Well, what were you planning on doing with them?  Give the damn eggs away...

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It's his Birthday...It's his Birthday...It's his Birthday...It's his Birthday...

Yes, Boo-ba-licious is 1 year old today.

And I'm absolutely stoked.  

I successfully (with Mumma's, Cappy, my friends and the Vet's help - that's Wellness checks like Plunket for babies) did 365 days with Boo-ba-licious and the whole of Mumma's pregnancy, and pre-pregnancy.

I'm super proud of us, that's a massive fucking achievement.

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And on an odd note: I was down feeding Belle this afternoon, got out of my car and the horse across the road and down a bit, started calling me.

He had been waiting for me.

This is not uncommon, when I'm at the stables by myself the horses always talk with me.  They always have.  No matter where I've been.

In fact, I've got myself into mucho trouble on more than one occasion because when I couldn't shut up, and have spoken about what was wrong with a horse, peeps have said that I went into paddocks or stalls, took off covers and that's why I knew.  That's kind of funny, because you know that I never go into a box or paddock of a horse I don't know.

To be fair, I don't know that I do much good for the horses, since humans very rarely listen, but the horses still talk, I chat back and then once again, I try and talk with humans.

Maybe it's just the effort the horses appreciate.

My Ok, let me give this another go... 

I'm interested in the horse across the road though, I'll go have a chat to him tomorrow, see what's going on.

I know, I know, be careful, biggggggggg trouble in Little China if I'm not.

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No horse.

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And all conversations start with:

Have you gelded that damn colt yet?

Noooooooo.....but not through lack of trying.  You can't blame me for the Vets lack of booking spaces...or the weather...

He needs to be cut asap before he gets too spoilt and arrogant.  And starts rearing.  Or gives you an imbred mongrel.

I made two more phone calls immediately after that conversation to:

a) Our Vet and 

b) Our Trainer.

Everything (fingers and hooves crossed) is set for next week.  Belle's coming home to grow and live in our herd, while Boo-ba-licious is taking her place to be gelded, and then start his first training.

To be fair though, it's not that he is arrogant and spoilt per se, rather he is tall, handsome, his legs are long and awesome, his butt is just booty-licious, he is muscular and strong, his cock hangs down to his knees (I kidd you not), he loves to run and everyone keeps telling him how fantastic he is.

Let's just say that he is confident.

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OMFG!

I went out to do afternoon feed, and that bloody shite had been playing with Ralphy poo with the gate between them in the Welcome Paddock.

Go on, ask me how I know?

Because somehow Boo-ba-licious had slipped his head inbetween the metal bits of the gate, lifted the gate off its hinges, got the gate on the ground, freaked out, got his head out.....

And then stood there with Cappy and Mumma on this side of the Welcome Paddock gate, with Ralphy poo, Chew and Suz on that side of the now down Welcome Paddock gate, with everyone just standing there looking all nonchalant like, Nothing to see here, Tania...

Both baby and gate are fine.

Snip  fucking  Snip.

* And no, no bloody photo's, we were getting gate up, horses sorted...

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So that's been our week:

Lots of horsey abundance and mucho Spirit with lots and lots and lots of eggs.

...and no damn snip.

Big kissy hugs 

Caps, me, Spirit, Az, Ralph, Chew, Suz, and of course, my beautiful Mumma Bear, Belle and Boo-ba-licious, Pat, Chuck, Rose, Petal, Kai-Anne, Pepper, Lily, Shelley, Ossie, Marmite and Geraldine.

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