Tania Kettle

And the little ones were uber well behaved on their visit today.  

Right up to the time I said, Time to go!  Which naturally made Chew take a pee.  

Inside.  

I think that I need to use another phrase or at least have them outside the front door when I say it.

However, they were right next to a train station (when a train came) really laid back about it and then walked down the main street of a little township and were still laid back and easy going.

Super impressed.

On another note, Az and I have been asked to do an in hand show in the next couple of weeks.  I said I was keen but am thinking of changing my mind.  We were originally going, then had a change of plans and for us to go now, I'm not doing it with the right intent.  I'm doing it to prove we can rather than because we want so I think I'm going to bail.  

I'm a better person than that and Az certainly deserves better than that from me.

And let's face it, Az and I have a great relationship because we love hanging out together, learning new things and getting our mojo going. 

That's the beginning, middle and end of our love story.

****

It's rained a lot still but there's also been big dollops of sunshine which I've been super stoked about and the horses love so there's been lots of jackets off kind of thing.

But overall it's been a pretty great week, a couple of 10's a couple of dog 2's but they were to be expected.  I mean, when I open those sweet lips of mine and beautiful words start tumbling out,

Thank you for your opinion but I will do exactly what I want, when I want, in the way that I want

...and with whomever I please.

I know that life is going to get batsh*te ugly in about 2.3 seconds so you know, those 2's weren't exactly unexpected.

But the 10's have also been great.

Sequoia's been in my thoughts a lot but mostly reminding me of what she taught me, how and why.

To listen to the balance of the world.  To tune in, to readjust and consistently touch what you cannot see.  And that's had some really great results.  Naturally, with the horses of course, but also with our home and it goes like this...

The young one is mad fit at the moment and is sitting about 11% body fat.  So, has been encouraging me to get mine down (let's just say not 11%) but somewhere between us, the Scientist and the Psychic, we've got results.  

Although not without it's challenges.

Chocolate is not a food.

Chocolate is fine, it's just being bullied at the moment.  Anyway, I've come in under my calories.

Yes, but the wrong calories.

or 

That food is not right.  It's bad calories and I don't care how healthy it is.  My body tells me it's wrong.

or

You've gone over your sugar intake by 50%.

Yes, but I'm under my calories.

Do you actually understand that sugar converts to fat...

or

My Energy's too high, it's too tight.  I can hear the ricies crackling in the kitchen...and I'm sitting in the living room.

So, there's been issues.  However, if we can get past the small hiccups we're getting fantastic results.  The Energy is amazingly clear so I'm totally tuned into the horses, pretty much on track with the rain and I'm currently (as I'm writing this) 78 kg's (and 5'9", 5'10" if you take into consideration my Soul Star Chakra) so am looking pretty damn great these days and feeling fabulous. 

Our goal is 72kgs and when we get there, we will reassess.  We're a bit dodge on going any less though because I start looking, well, a bit sick.  

Impoverished.

Undernourished. 

I'm guess I'm just a curve girl and I'm totally fine with that. 

Wishing you much love my friends and of course, my humans.

Caps, me, Spirit, Az, Sequoia (in Spirit), Ralph, Chew, Buzz, Flash and Feeny.

xxxxxxxxxx

* There is a daily chocolate bar (Crunchie, Black Forrest, Whittakers Toffee or Milky Bar - and normal size not that stupid fun size) in my life but I try my very, very hardest not to eat two.  Mostly it works. 

** You will never convince me that carrying extra weight does not have a basis in emotional trauma though.  I do the right thing foodwise and lose little bits then I start getting nightmares.  Seriously, I get the worst dreams.  Then I get a kink in my neck and right shoulder.  So, I get the healing stones out, use them, then use them and sleep with them and then Boom! I've dropped a couple of kg's again.  

Which is weird because I think I'm pretty happy these days.  But by what I have spoken about this actually means that I'm happy in the present but still have blockages which are holding onto past hurts and trauma.  Well, I have to be otherwise I wouldn't need to use the stones.  

So, working on that theory it would mean that when I'm talking about emotions and eating I'm not talking about being lonely or depressed but rather past hurtful words or actions which have have left a dent in the soul.  

But just as a side comment, I've known a fair few f*ked up skinny people as well.

Just saying.

*** Oh and by the way, your right shoulder/arm goes out when you are frustrated and want to physically slap some sense into someone.

**** I am grateful for many, many things in my life but it is my son, Spirit and horses who have made my good life, awe inspiringly, great.